Dogs don't cry. > >>*

Dogs love it when your friends come over. > >>*

Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo. > >>*

Dogs think you sing great. > >>*

A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink. > >>*

Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late. The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you. > >>*

Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs. > >>*

Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name. > >>*

Dogs are excited by rough play. > >>*

Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away. > >>*

Dogs understand that farts are funny. > >>*

Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair. > >>*

Anyone can get a good-looking dog. > >>*

If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it. > >>*

Dogs don't shop. > >>*

Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor. > >>*

A dog's disposition stays the same all month long. > >>*

Dogs never need to examine the relationship. > >>*

Dog's parents never come for a visit. > >>*

Dogs love long car trips. > >>*

Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions. > >>*

When a dog gets old and starts to snap at you incessantly,it's OK to shoot it. > >>*

Dogs like beer. > >>*

Dogs don't hate their bodies. > >>*

No dog ever put on 100 pounds after reaching adulthood. > >>*

Dogs never criticize. > >>*

Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across. > >>*

Dogs never expect gifts. > >>*

It's legal to keep a dog chained up at your house. > >>*

Dogs don't worry about germs. > >>*

Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you ever had. > >>*

Dogs like to do their snooping outside as opposed to in your wallet, desk, and the back of your sock drawer. > >>*

Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives. > >>*

You never have to wait for a dog. They're ready to go 24 hours a day. > >>*

Dogs have no use for flowers, cards, or jewelry. > >>*

Dogs don't borrow your shirts. > >>*

Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public. > >>*

Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk. > >>*

Dogs can't talk. > >>*

Dogs aren't catty. > >>

Dogs seldom outlive you.

* Both look stupid in hats. > >>

* Both can eat 5 pounds of chocolate in one sitting. (Note: that too much chocolate will kill a dog) > >>

* Both tend to have "hip" problems. > >>

* Neither understand football. > >>

* Both are good at pretending that they're listening to every word you say. > >>

* Neither believe that silence is golden. > >>

* Neither can balance a checkbook. > >>

* You can never tell what either of them is thinking. > >>

* Both put too much value on kissing.